Sep. 1, 2015

Beware of Choices that put Miles on your Mind and Body.....

When describing her childhood, one word she used often was wonderful. She said it was really the only  way to describe that time, full of many adventures that any child would dream of, traveling, Virgin Pina Coladas, staying in the flyest hotels, eating in the flyest restaurants with no concepts of cost and how fly these places really were. No concept of other kids, other people not living the same life, not doing the same things.

Two distinct memories. Rodeo Drive, the ESCADA Store, sipping on bubbling apple cider, eating little sandwiches while mom is trying on clothes, age seven. Another, the Bahamas, The Atlantis Resort, the room key is the credit card, all charged back to the company, unlimited access to anything, spa treatments, swimming with the dolphins, food till you can’t eat any more, age thirteen. Just two of the memories of the many,many things she was exposed too as a child but she wanted more, wanted the “dark” side, wanted danger and boys and when she met her little fast best friend, Beyonica, it was all down hill from there.

Beyonica’s mom allowed boys and freedom and she wanted it all but very quickly she learned the “life style” wasn’t for her. They met what they thought were two nice men while walking home from the bus stop one day. They were easy prey, young and ready for corruption. These men were thirtyish and the young lady was fourteen and a virgin.

Her first time was not pleasant, gentle, sweet or romantic but rough and painful. He was unaware that it was her first time but she was sure he figured it out very quickly but it changed nothing, it was just another day for him. Four weeks later, she’s sick in the hospital. She can’t keep anything down and is clueless as to why. After testing everything under the sun….a pregnancy test was done, JACKPOT!! She is told, in front of all her family, that she is fourteen and pregnant!

Her mom didn’t handle it well. She shut down, shut her out but everyone processes, handles and deals with things differently. As she grew into a women, she understands that now but at the time her world was falling apart, how was she to deal? What was she to do?

Enters her father.

Her Knight in shining armor. Keeping the baby never crossed her mind, really she never thought it was an option so she found herself, a few days before her birthday at the abortion clinic with her father. His first born, the child most like him, making the choice to terminate her first born but he was right by her side, bless his heart, his strengthen, his lack of judgment, his unconditional support was the only thing that got her through. How grateful and humbled she is for the support and love.

Who supports you with no questions, no requirements, no judgement, just support, unconditional ? Never take it for granted. Never forget that without said support, you would not be where you are, right here, right now. Remember....Remember…..Remember, never forget.

On the flip side, you must find good in all sides of a situation and there were blessings to be had in her mother’s reaction. It taught her to just move forward. To never to pity herself. To never dwell in mistakes, just learn, make different choices, forgive yourself and don’t live there, move forward. She’s grateful for that lesson too.

Dedication...Umi Says….Moss Deff....